Manna - even reading the word brings about this sense of a deep breath exhaled. There’s a writer I came across recently and she mentioned manna in a story, and it was like a neon yellow marker highlighted the word right in front of my eyes.
My "Word of the Year" and its intention changes from year to year. Sometimes it’s a word that’s more of a challenge and other years it’s an easy shift. This year it’s somehow both.
Manna was a daily food ration supplied to the Israelites when they were in the desert after escaping Egypt. It was literal food, but was also a reminder of God’s providence, His blessing and His ability to take care of their needs daily.
I NEED to be reminded of this.
This year has been incredibly challenging:
People change.
Friendships shift.
Marriage is no joke.
Parenting is hard.
Family can be constricting and difficult.
Church can make you feel misunderstood and unimportant.
Ministry opportunities can be unfulfilling.
And beyond just the scope of my immediate circle of life, the world is messed up. There’s rampant pain and suffering everywhere and it crushes my soul knowing that the enemy has victory day after day.
And yet there’s hope…
Being raised in church I know the importance of spending time with the Lord often, and I’ve had seasons where I’m on top of it, but also had spans of time where my Bible literally starts collecting dust on my nightstand.
I recently read through the book of Exodus and it was shocking to me that the Israelites complained as much as they did after coming out of Egypt. They witnessed what could be the most extravagant miracle of the Old Testament in the parting of the Red Sea and yet three days later they’re whining and losing faith. Also, they literally had a glory cloud, like God’s actual presence hovering above them and they lost hope and started whining. I’d love to say I’m so different, but I’m not. I’ll see the favor of the Lord pour out in my life in some beautiful way and then completely forget about it when the hard times inevitably cycle around. Granted, living now it’s not a feast or famine situation, it’s more gazing at my daughter’s perfect nose or relaxing into a warm bed then getting confused and frustrated at a news article that reeks of injustice or the behaviors of friends and family that don’t make sense.
So here’s what I love about manna and the promise of being in the Word everyday:
1. It was fresh daily - I know that being in the Word is a gift and that there’s something new for me to understand and take in every time. Even if it’s a passage or story I’ve read before it’s inevitable that something new will stand out.
2. It was all they needed for that day - So much of my worry comes from trying to predict the future and attempting to wrap my feeble mind around what I THINK is going to happen. Nah. God is so much bigger and better than my reasoning. I need to take in what I can for today and allow tomorrow to take care of itself.
3. It was sweet - Exodus says that manna tasted like crackers with honey on it. It was easy to eat and enjoy, and time in the Word is that for me. I started reading through the Bible with The Message translation and it’s a shift from the King James Version that I was raised on. It’s easy to understand and digest and makes so many passages read in a sweet yet satisfying way.
This year was difficult, but at the same time I’ve seen how the Lord has provided freedom and fresh understanding:
People change - Yeah, but that doesn’t mean that I have to.
Friendships shift - This was for some reason revolutionary to me, but it made me appreciate those in my life that are ride or die and allowed me to be fond of memories of the past without having unrealistic expectations for the future.
Marriage is no joke - I love Ryan and this year we put in some work and learned to collaborate instead of compete - literally best year ever.
Parenting IS hard - But it’s a beautiful difficulty that when I lean into the exhaustion, the slowness and the instruction it’s somehow more rewarding than I ever thought it could be.
Family CAN be difficult - But when I put in time and create a safe space for open communication it lowers walls and starts to form real relationships.
Church IS imperfect - But it’s trying it’s best and when I step back and give it credit for all the good it’s doing it’s easier to work slowly on the areas that need help.
Ministry opportunities CAN shift - And that’s okay. For everything there is a season, and it’s important to know when to step away from something that isn’t your lane.
2018, God, I’m grateful to you for teaching me the importance of focus and patience and love. 2019, Lord, prepare my heart and give me the dedication and commitment to seek You daily.
Cheers.
"Give us today our daily bread..." Matthew 6:11
