The joy of being completely wrong

It's a rare occasion when this gal is wrong (two thumbs pointing at me). Seriously. I'm logical, I know an fair amount of pop trivia and random historical and scientific facts, I'm not assertive or aggressive in an argument situation, and I don't get overly emotional about decisions (unless it's "Bachelorette" finale night - really, Andi? Josh not Nick? Whyyyyyyy?). A few months ago though, I got the wind knocked out of me because I was wrong. Big time. Not the kind of wrong where you can pull off a quick recovery, like when you accidentally trip but don't drop all the way to the ground and hurriedly look around to see if anyone saw you. Not even the kind of wrong where you can pretend like you just mispronounced something or the person you're talking to misunderstood you: "You thought I said I hate this cilantro-weighted salsa? No, no, I said I CRAVE it, I CRAAAAVE this delicious, flowery, herbal concoction". No, this was the real kind of wrong. The kind of wrong where you weren't even a little bit right. The wrong that leaves you speechless, standing still as your brain spins, your heart speeds up, your voice is shaky and you wonder how in the world your seemingly smart mind could have been so completely off-base. It wasn't a dangerous or harmful situation in any way. It was a life decision. One that Ryan had mentioned to me, and though initially I questioned it, the more I thought about it and prayed, a peace surrounded my mind, even though it meant that we were going to go through some changes. The more we talked about it, the more excited we got, but a few weeks into our idea taking form, we were told "no". We were told a "no" that was so firm, there was no going around it. The scope of the idea came to a screeching halt and there was no kick-starting it back up again. Which brings me to my point - how do I handle it when I'm wrong? When Ryan proves himself to be right in an argument, I always see his point of view and concede victory to him. This is rare, but it happens. But this was different because this felt unjustifiably wrong. I couldn't understand the reasons and have a discussion about them. And so the question is - how do I handle it when I'm wrong? For the next 24 hours I teared up. I got mad. I paced outside. I didn't sleep peacefully. I placed blame on people that didn't deserve it. All in all - did NOT handle it very well. But the next couple days, I got good thought time in. Good talking to Jesus time. Good self-realization time. Good "Honestly, you're not all that and a bag of chips" time. The problem sometimes with being a smart, confident, God-loving mom and wife is that you start to make decisions based on experience, knowledge and your own understanding. Yah. Proverbs 3:5-6 has a little something to say about that. I hadn't technically hear God say "no", so I assumed that it was a go-for-it "yes". Sometimes He says "wait", and in my haste, I skipped right past that option. Now that we're a couple months past it, Ry and I don't even talk about it anymore. We know that God has a "best" for us and that wasn't it. There's a humility that came over me because of it and that is something that's kind of priceless. Not saying that I want it to happen a bunch more, but still... God is so good. He's so faithful to hear our prayers and answer them. I just got a good reminder to REALLY listen for His voice. Because being still and waiting on Him can never go wrong.